"There was silence...then I heard a voice" (Job 4:16, NKJV).
I have a confession to make. I frequently dislike the 'silent times' and I am going through one of those at the moment. You're probably wondering what I mean - by a 'silent time', I mean one of those periods when Heaven is completely silent, like a TV channel or Radio station that is off the air and all you can hear is a hissing sound or see a white flickering screen.
I miss waking up in the morning having both a very intense awareness of Yahweh's presence and a very clear word burning in my mind and heart. They are my daily manna. On the other hand I am very familiar with 'silent times' and experience tell me that they are not at all bad, even though we may be tempted to think that Yahweh is displeased with us and has turned His back on us or we have wandered away from Him and turned our back on Him. Of course the latter does happen and that can be the occasion for a 'silent time' in which case there is some repentance to be done - though when that happens there is usually a sense of something 'missing' and their is a heart-tug to get back where we were again. But that is not why I am primarily writing today.
I guess He knew I would be reacting to my current 'silent time' and that I would be sharing my thoughts with you on it so I ask for some guidance as I do! I will say this - most silent times are like a punctuation mark or a pause linking one event or series of events to a new and imminent event or series of events. That, at least, has often been my experience. And I so have this deep sense that we are on the cusp of enormous change, not only because of the way world events are rapidly develloping but for other intangible reasons also.
Most of us fear change though some people thrive on it. I must admit my natural disposition is to find a 'comfortable place' and stay there as long as I can. But Yahweh is teaching me to get used to cusp life - to be in Him you really have to. I might have attributed this sense of imminent change to the fact that yesterday we rearranged our house (that left me pretty exhausted) but I have had this sense for some weeks and the 'silent time' is a week or two long now. So that wasn't the cause.
I strongly hesitate preparing devotionals at these times for fear that the subject matter is from my own will instead of His, and I have no doubt that sometimes that is the case. There's a risk also that we get on a track and get so used to it that we fail to realise He wants us on another track pointing in a different direction. That can also be the reason for a 'silent time' because it's easy to suppose that once Yahweh has put you on that track that He wants you going down it indefinitely. But whilst Heavenly directives for our lives as a whole are fixed and immovable in the long term (the "strait and narrow") - the strategic aspect, if you like - there are often lots of short-term 'tactical' moves to be made too which either may be corrections that have to be amde for leaning in a wrong direction ourselves or because He wants to you verge to meet someone else coming onto your current track - a going after a "lost sheep", as it were.
Indeed my last thoughts last night were how complicated life is, not because the Besorah (Gospel) is complicated (it isn't at all) but because we are immersed in a world where nearly everyone is off-track and fumbling around in the darkness, deceived by the enemy and not having a clue where they are going. Our feet are dipped in that to varying extents based on our involvement in their lives and as we try to keep our direction and not lose it because these people want us to go their way. The emet (truth) is we are making hundreds - if not thousands - of daily mental, emotional and spiritual adjustments if we are truly labouring hard - as we ought to be - to stay concretely (inwardly and outwardly) on Yahweh's Derech (Way).
I believe that is why Yahweh commanded His men-servants to wear Tzitzit or tassels (Num.15:37-41). Every time I reach into my pockets for something or look down I see them and they fulfill their purpose. What these stand for become especially important in 'silent times'. They are to remind us to obey His mitzvot (commandments) no matter what is - or isn't - happening in our lives. They are to remind us to be holy or set-apart to Him always. His female servants are supposed to wear headcoverings for similar reasons. For women, who tend to live far more in their emotions than men, this is especially important so that they remain in their fathers (if unmarried) or husbands as he is reminded by his tzitzit to remain set-apart and inside the spiritual fortifications of El Elyon (the Most High One).
One thing that wives occasionally find frustrating is that men seem to have a divinely built-in mental 'empty box' that they every now and then retreat into to get away from stress and to spiritually 'detoxify'. Men, who are built in the image of their Heavenly Father, have their 'silent times' too which is important for women to understand. By the same token, women do not seem to, which can be difficult for both genders because silence is for most women a 'terrible thing' and when their men go quiet they can come to all sorts of wrong conclusions, just as we do when our Heavenly Father goes silent. But there is nothing 'bad' about this, just as there is nothing 'bad' about a woman not going quiet. The Ruach haQodesh (Holy Spirit) certainly never does! Understanding the 'silent times' of men is important for successful marriages.
One thing I know is that the stream of daily revelation will return, and sooner rather than later. I have come to recognise this aspect of my Father's character and behaviour. I still miss that 'active communion' and yet I know He is still there through the Ruach (Spirit) even as I write and listen to the direction being given me. Therefore I have shalom (peace) in both the quiet and active times.
May you all have a blessed day in Yah'shua (Jesus) our Messiah! Amen.