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FORMER CRITICS
4. Derek Part 2 My Testimony of MLT by Derek
Click here for Derek Part 1
My name is Derek. For three years, I have been a bitter enemy of Mishpachah Lev-Tsiyon
(also known as Messianic Evangelicals). For the longest time, I believed this was right,
believing the group was a cult.
In 2006, shortly after I had my brain surgery for my brain infection, I had a dream. In my
dream, I was in the back seat of a car parked next to an empty field. It was pitch black
outside, the only source of light being a street light on a nearby telephone pole. I couldn't
see into the front of a car, due to the darkness, but I knew someone was in the front seat.
I was told by the Spirit to test it, as I knew the source was demonic, but I didn't dare. I
didn't want to see who the driver of the vehicle was. But then I "heard" a voice telling me
that as a result of my turning away from Yahweh, my life was going to fall apart.
And it did. For three miserable years, I was back where I started, having no hope nor sense
of accomplishment. I did things that I regret, things that I won't mention here as I don't
want to give the enemy of our souls further ammunition to use against me. But in my heart,
spiritually, at least, I knew I was a murderer. And it was starting to show in my actions
and countenance, even if I didn't commit the physical act of murder itself.
“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder;
and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who
is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother
will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of
fire" (Matthew 5:21, English Standard Version).
After finally hurting someone I darely cared for, I recognized that I had to do something.
For a short time, I turned to psychiatry. When that didn't work (it actually made me worse),
I decided to swallow my pride and turn back to Yahweh. Within a short amount of time, I
noticed years of problems beginning to dissipate. I decided to quit my life of lies and evil
and fix the wrongs I have committed.
Regarding the ministry of Mishpachah Lev-Tsiyon in particular, I decided to try to make
up, in the best way possible (and with Yahweh's help), those I have hurt. I don't know if
Yahweh has called me to this particular ministry, but in the end that doesn't matter.
What matters is faith in Yah'shua the Messiah (Jesus Christ).
"And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your
heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first
commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On
these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 5:37-40, ESV).
I'm learning, the closer I draw to Yahweh, that He alone will heal my relationships
with those around me. That the most important relationship I can have is with Him.
And it is through Him and the interaction of those He puts in my life that I learn
how to love people.
In regards to Mishpachah Lev-Tsiyon, however, it is not my belief that it is a cult.
And even if it was, it still does not excuse how I acted toward them. Admittedly, I was hurt
myself, but instead of taking the mature route and trying to work through my problems, I chose
to live in my hurt. And "hurt" is never a good motive to take action. Because hurt clouds
reason and cloudy reason causes doubt. And where doubt is, Yahweh's voice isn't.
When I finally did turn from my evil ways, I was
surprised by Christopher Warren's response:
I was warmed by the fact that he said that they weren't going to try to recruit me back
to the group, as I felt this wasn't really what I needed to hear right now. For me, at least,
that was the evidence I needed that MLT isn't a cult. And Christopher has told me similar
several times in the past, when I was involved with the group, that I was free to leave
if Yahweh called me elsewhere. So even though I still have unresolved issues, I intend on
working them out no matter where Yahweh takes me. It is just my hope that Yahweh can use
me to bring people closer to Him.
The truth is I'm the one who placed Christopher Warren on a pedestal. I'm the one who
used him in place of Yahweh. And Yahweh is now showing me that I need to develop my
relationship with Him, that I should seek Him for the answers I need. As far as I'm concerned,
at the very least, Christopher Warren is the pastor of a church that tries to live
according to the truth as they know it.
Likewise, regarding the cult accusation, it is also my belief that even the biblical
church that Yah'shua established in ancient days would be considered cultic. Yah'shua
said only He was the way to Heaven (John 14:6), asked His followers to symbolically
eat His flesh and drink His blood (John 6:48-71) and said we must love Him more than father
and mother, to the point where our love for them seems like hate (Luke 14:26). So we know
that, certainly, from the biblical viewpoint, isolation from the world isn't neccessarily
"cultic". The issue is whether or not a group abides in the truth. And if MLT isn't
of Yahweh, it will crumble when Yah'shua returns (Matthew 15:13). The most important thing any
of us can do is to seek the face of Yahweh. And to love our enemies.
"But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and
your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the
ungrateful and the evil" (Luke 6:35 ESV).
This truly is my wish, to do good to everyone, no matter what. My desire is to repent. To
serve Him and it is only through my faith in Him that He can help me make up for the evils I
have done. Please pray for me that He might give me the strength, as I desire to do things
right. And if I have hurt you, feel free to contact me at any time through the
Ning group and I will see what I can do to reconcile.
Click here for Derek Part 3
This page was created on 14 July 2009
Last updated on 14 July 2009
Copyright © 2009 NCCG - All Rights Reserved
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