had visited Tartu from Norway in September to help the Pastorate better organise their congregation and to coordinate evangelism, but the hoped-for visit by Björn had not as yet materialised. He had simply been too busy getting ready for the builders who were arriving to make extensive modifications on various buildings. The Fellowship was loathe to lose Elisa to Sweden for she had, in the four brief months as their Pastress, been a tremendous blessing to them all, and especially to the sisters.
The four women were all thoroughly excited packing their bags on the evening before. Elisa had given her notice of resignation to the University of Tartu as lecturer in Economics two months previously and Salme had similarly withdrawn from her Economics course. Hilda Rätsep and Silvia Saarma had both been given early leave though it had been hard persuading their respective employers to release them a few days before the vaccation started. It had been especially hard for Silvia as it was examination time and much secretarial work was required, but not so for Hilda whose gymnastics classes effectively had ended at about this time.
For weeks before, Elisa and Salme had spent many an evening slowly packing up their home. Rather than sell it, Elisa had agreed to rent the property to Hilda and Silvia as a semi-furnished house. And in order to save removal costs to Sweden, they had cut down the number of their worldly goods to the barest minimum. Though she knew that Kadesh-Napthtali was already well furnished, she had inherited a number of family heirlooms in the form of 17th and 18th century furniture which she was loathe to part with. These were all despatched two days before their departure and the day after that, Hilda and Silvia moved their own things in. It was all done very efficiently.
The four took a train to Tallinn, the Estonian capital, and from there flew directly to Stockholm. Björn travelled down the day before, spent the night with friends, and met them at the airport in Stan's Mercedes-Benz.
Björn had no difficulty spotting the four women who stood out like cultural curiosities in their elegant dresses amongst the bubble-jackets, jeans and plimsoles of Swedish culture. Though Estonians had already gone a long way in imitating their Western neighbours in almost everything, there were still many who cherished the old ways. In this respect Elisa had led the way, for she was naturally of this disposition. Salme followed suit once she learned of Stan's preferences and the other two simply tagged along, supposing that the other patriarchs would be of the same mind.
In actual practice, Björn was of the modern generation in his clothing habits before he had moved to Kadesh-Naphtali, and it had been Misha who had injected some cultural self-consciousness into him. Bengt and Nils, having a Seventh Day Adventist background which had encouraged sensible dress, had adapted to New Covenant ways with comparative ease. The only "rebel" at Kadesh-Naphtali was Maria, who wore nothing but teashirts and jeans, even on the Sabbath, and who had shown no signs of conforming to the expectations of the community, much to everyone's irritation. Even Karl, whose hand she was seeking, had failed to make an impact. When Karin Åkerstedt had started imitating Maria's ways, both her father and Wladyslaw had made it quite clear what they thought, and she had complied, albeit reluctantly at first.
In many respects, the standards which Stan wished to inculcate into the community members who had come straight out of the world, or who had been in churches that tolerated worldliness, had been a relentless uphill struggle, and he would have preferred to have used his energies on other things. But he knew only too well that the problems that the community faced were not simply the two generations of deeply ingrained habits but the whole - now deeply entrenched - spirit of the 60's - the spirit of rebellion against authority. Demolishing this very dangerous idol had, therefore, to be one of the colony's priorities, for without voluntary submission to the pastoral authority of the leaders, any sense of cohesion and spiritual growth would be impossible. And this was as true for the colony members in their relationship to the patriarchs as it was to the plural wives and their children to their husbands and fathers, respectively.
The twin principles of obedience and respect were therefore taught the colony's children from an early age, things almost totally absent in the neo-pagan culture all around them which taught the pernicious doctrine of "rights". To obedience and respect was, of course, added responsibility. With this trinity of values embedded in the undergirding virtue of love, Stan insisted, the colony would thrive and be blessed. He would often compare Love to God, and the three virtues of Obedience, Respect and Responsibility to the Father, Son and Spirit. The unifying principle of love defined the other Three, and the Three obtained their motive power from the One.
Brought up in the Soviet era as the four Estonian women had been, the values came more or less naturally to them. Stan often said that it was easier for a communist to make the transition from atheism to Christ than it was for a nominal Christian from the secular West making the transition to Biblical Christianity. As far as Eastern Europe was concerned there was, he claimed, another year of 'grace' before it became a cheap imitation of the fallen West. After that, the same problems would be faced in the East as in the West in bringing souls to Christ, only for both it would be considerably worse.
To see such well-gromed and evidently cultured women emerging from the baggage collection area in the airport sent a thrill down Björn's spine. He already knew what it was like to be married to an East European, Misha Jankus, and had not unnaturally wondered if there might be a third wife for him amongst the two unspoken-for Estonians. Both Misha and Sonja were keen to expand their family as they observed the happiness in Stan's seemingly multiply unchecked. Even the Nilssons' were beginning to reconsider the possibilities. Only Bengt seemed unmoved by all the excited anticipatation of the arrival of the guests; and of the four patriarchs in Kadesh-Naphtali, he had more or less settled for the monogamous way. She would, as he put it, have to "bowl me over" and an angel would have to give him a big slap on the shoulder were he to be persuaded to join the polygamy fellowship himself!
From the moment they met, there was a chemistry between Björn and Silvia. They talked practically continuously all the way from Stockholm to Kadesh-Naphtali leaving Elisa, Salme and Hilda to natter amongst themselves in Estonian on the back seat. Now and then Björn would pull himself away from what was for him Silvia's "magnetic aura" and tell the others about the countryside, Sweden and the customs of his country, apologising each time for neglecting them. Hilda and Salme giggled each time he did so, realising that something was gelling between the two, though Hilda now began to feel as though she was the 'odd one out' without a man to come home to or be seriously interested in. Silvia was mesmerised by the handsome Swedish blonde and barely took her eyes off him, enjoying every moment of the attention he gave her.
"How does our Swedish countryside compare to yours?" he asked her, making conversation.
"It's much flatter in Estonia," she answered, gazing intently at his ruddy Scandinavian features.
She kept asking herself inside, "Is this the man? Is this the one I've been waiting for for so long?" and each time she did, she felt more and more certain. But was it all of the flesh? She couldn't tell, for learning to discern the Spirit was a skill she was still acquiring.
Björn seemed to be in no doubt and could barely contain his excitement. Whenever Silvia would answer a question he asked, he would wonder how Misha and Sonja would react to her. It had been a while now since he had added a new wife to his little family of five and he felt all the excitement of a youth falling in love again. Yet he knew relatively little about Silvia and remembered what Stan has counselled about taking things carefully and slowly. But it was hard.
The hours drifted by in pleasant conversation as the couple exchanged histories, personal hopes and what lay ahead of them. It was interesting for Elisa and Salme to hear of Björn's feelings about Kadesh-Naphtali, the Gospel, and, of course, about Stan whom they were shortly to marry. When they could get a word in edgeways they were asking their own questions.
"What does Stan's family feel about our arrival?" she had asked him, a little apprehensively, as she remembered that she was marrying not one person but ten.
Björn laughed. "They're so very excited that they can't wait to see you! In the last few weeks they have talked about almost nothing else. And I know they've been working hard to get your rooms ready for you. Hanna is especially excited!"
The two women felt warm inside. This was the way they had always wanted and dreamed of plural marriage. But would Stan's glowing articles on his Web page, and what he had told them in Tartu, live up to reality?
Björn caught the glances the two women were making to each other in the rear mirror and guessed what was passing through their minds.
"Stan's been as excited as a chicken waiting for mealtime," said Björn grinning. "You ladies must have done something to him whilst he was in Estonia because he seems to have regained some of his youth."
He wondered if he should tell them how down in the dumps Stan had been when he had got back from Estonia but felt nothing good would come of it and skipped it. They were by now, in any case, thoroughly excited and seemed to wear an expression of joy on their faces for the rest of the journey. He kicked himself for having been so preoccupied with Silvia and forgetting the other guests.
They were passing through Börlange now and it was dark. The snow lay in large drifts on either side of the road where it had been cleared away by the snow-ploughs. Björn told them that this was where Hanna had come onto the Królewiec scene. Now the snow-covered mountains were looming closer and the conversation died out as the women gazed out of the car windows to drink in nature ... all except Silvia, of course, whose vision seemed now only to consist of Björn. She gave brief nods or muffled grunts to Björn's discourses to indicate that she was paying some attention. Björn was flattered by the attention and would have done a lot more eye gazing had he not been required to watch the road.
As they left Börlange and headed towards the village of Gagne down the near-deserted country road Björn suddenly braked in order to avoid three large elk making their way across the road. The women were all startled as the beasts thundered in front of them and disapperared into the inky night. There were no street lights out here. The windscreen wipers worked flat out as the snow began to fall more thickly and all that was visible were two arks of window pane. The odd pair of flashing lights by the roadside indicated the eyes of wild animals reflecting his headlights - perhaps foxes, badgers, deer, or even elk. Björn drove carefully.
"If we're lucky you might see a few Björns," teased Björn, leaving the women confused. He laughed. "Didn't you know that my name Björn means 'bear´?"
The thought of wild bears roaming about somehow snuffed out the humour of Björn's little joke.
"Are their bears out here?" asked Hilda anxiously.
"There are some but not so many now. In any case, I've never seen one," said Björn, trying to placate them.
Elisa's heart began to race. Stan had never mentioned bears to them as it had never occurred to him. Gone were the days when bears and wolves used to menace the rural Swedes.
Björn remembered one of Stan's jokes and thought he'd try his hand at humour a second time round.
"There was a bear that used to live out in these parts that has become a part of folk lore," said Björn, secretly grinning inside.
The women listened intently.
"The local Lutheran priest was a renowned bear-hunter and was called upon to take care of this particular bear which was going around killing the farmers' cows and sheep," continued Björn. "So the priest offered to go and take care of the rogue bear, and boasted that all he needed was one cartridge to do the job.
"So the priest went out into the snowy landscape with his shotgun and one cartridge in the breech. At length he stumbled across the bear who was not in the mood for receiving guests. Seeing the priest, the enormous animal raised up onto its back legs ready to make a charge. The priest took a step backwards, slipped on some concealed ice, and accidentally pulled the trigger, discharging his only shot harmlessly into the air.
"Now you cannot outrun a bear. And you can't go and hide in a tree like you might from wolves, because bears climb trees. About your only chance is to drop down onto the ground and play dead. You have about a 70% chance of survival, so long as you don't show any signs of life and so long as the bear doesn't trample you to death or, if he's hungry enough, decide to eat you all the same."
The women sat petrified as Björn expertly recounted Stan's story.
"So the priest decided he would take his chances and run, even though he knew the bear would probably catch up on him. His only hope was a hut or some other human residence behind whose door he could find refuge. But no huts came into sight and the bear got closer and closer. In desperation, the priest cried out to God to give the bear a change of heart by making him a Christian, and so hopefully abandon the chase and let him go free.
"As he turned round to see if his prayer had had any effect, he saw that the bear was practically upon him. And then the miracle happened - the bear opened its mouth wide and began to speak, saying: 'For what I am about to receive, may the Lord make me truly grateful. Amen.'"
There was dead silence in the car for a second and then, suddenly, Hilda began shrieking with laughter! As the humour sank in, so all the women joined in and they laughed for a solid ten minutes afterwards. Björn was pleased to find that they had a sense of humour. He knew how drole the Finns could be, and as the Estonians were related to the Finns, he began to wonder.
"That's one of Stan's jokes," said Björn, "and one of my favourites."
This was an aspect of Stan they did not know too much about since the time in Tartu, with all the drama of revival, didn't really give him the opportunity to show his funny side too much.
The time passed and before they knew it they were driving up the dirt road that lead to the Christian colony. They did not arrive in Kadesh-Naphtali until after midnight and were thoroughly exhausted - at least Björn and Silvia were, for the others had taken naps along the way, until Björn had got into his humerous vein. Stan had waited up for the guests, telling the rest of the family to get to bed, as he wasn't sure when the group would arrive.
Stan was waiting inside the house as it was particularly cold that evening, the thermometer having dropped to -19°C, which was unusually cold for the time of the year. Blue, black and white Estonian flags were flying alongside the Order's banners in neat rows on either side of the front door and flapped vigorously in the freezing wind. It was Stan's traditional way of welcoming guests.
He flung the door open before Björn could press the bell and so disturb the sleeping household and hurried everyone into the warmth while Björn hauled their suitcases indoors. Without waiting, Salme, whose emotions had suddenly bubbled to the surface at seeing her fiancée, flung herself on Stan and started kissing him all over the face. Stan held out his right arm to Elisa and in seconds all three were in tight embrace.
"Welcome home, my darlings," said Stan excitedly, and kissed them both again, before releasing them and going over to greet Hilda and Silvia. He thanked Björn for all his trouble, helped the women off with their snow-covered coats, and showed them to their four rooms which some of his wives had prepared earlier that day.
"Is anyone hungry?" he asked, and four heads nodded vigorouly. Björn declined the offer, and excused himself to get back to his wives. Silvia wished he had stayed.
"Let's go to the kitchen and I'll fix you up a bite," said Stan as he led the way holding Elisa's and Salme's hands.
The women gasped at the splendour of the herregård as Stan explained briefly where one or two essential rooms were.
"I'll show you everything in the morning as we'll need a couple of hours to see the whole estate, and at least forty-five minutes just to see round the house!" said Stan, evidently enjoying the women's reactions from their first impressions.
They all sat around the pine kitchen table which he had already been laid out and within minutes was serving them waffles.
"A Scandinavian speciality," said Stan, as they wolfed down the woffles as they came out of the woffle-making machine. "I'm not overly fond of them myself but I've learned to acquire the taste."
They all threw glances at one another as they ate, smiling and excitedly dropping the odd word in Estonian here and there. They had suddenly come to life inspite of the long journey.
"I'm afraid I don't understand Estonian," said Stan, "and I can't speak it anymore - at least not since we left Tartu."
The women took the hint.
"The house looks lovely," said Elisa, and then stopped as she didn't know what more to say. "It's every bit as beautiful as in the photographs you sent us."
"Well, darlings," he said looking at his fiancées, "it's your home now, and welcome."
He looked at the other women.
"You are our guests here and I hope you take the opportunity to exercise the freedom of the house," he said.
They nodded gratefully.
"If at any time you feel you want to go and stay with any of the other families on the estate, feel free to ask. No-one will be offended. And please know that all the other families have volunteered to house you. It's just that you may feel you want to be around one or more of the other families while you're here. Don't be embarrassed to ask if you do." Stan knew that Hilda and Silvia might gravitate to some of the other families, especially if romance started surfacing.
Hilda started giggling. "I think I know where Silvia wants to stay!"
Silvia blushed and Elisa reproved her in Estonian.
"Oh yes, that's fine, Silvia, if you want to stay at the Engströms' home. We'll make arrangements tomorrow if you want to. Or you may get an invitation." Stan grinned, gleaning from the various signals the girls were giving, and the way she had said to goodnight to Björn, that something romantic was already afoot.
But Silvia was still embarrassed and didn't say anything more. With the woffles washed down with generous quantities of milk, everyone retired for the night.
When Björn arrived at the herrgård at 7 o'clock the next morning to speak to Stan, it was to make a formal invitation to Silvia to stay at the Engström house in a day or two after the women had settled in. Misha and Sonja had already been appraised of Björn's interest in Silvia and wanted to meet her too.
Hanna was the first up and was waiting anxiously to see her sister-wives-to-be again and in the end simply couldn't contain herself and went and knocked on Salme's door. The squeals of delight from the two women soon woke up the others who were in adjacent rooms and within minutes the five of them were all chattering excitedly in Salme's room.
"It's so wonderful to see you all," said Hanna, and went and kissed all four women for the second time round. "You haven't changed one bit!"
One by one the four were introduced to Stan's wives and children as they emerged from their bedrooms for breakfast and the corridor began to fill with bodies. Elisa and Slame were bewildered, having suddenly found themselves thrust into the heart of an ocean of warm affection and lots of faces who, whilst not new then because of the photographs they had seen, were revealing for the first time the personalities behind them.
Gradually they all filtered down to the dining room for breakfast and awaited Stan who came into the room with a big grin on his face. In seconds he was surrounded by women and children seeking good morning hugs and kisses. The Estonians watched on in fascination at the energy that suddenly seemed to spill over everywhere. Whatever clouds of sleepiness had been hanging over the slow wakers-up were suddenly gone as the sunshine of their life bathed them with his love.
"Good morning, ladies," said Stan to the Estonians, slightly bowing and clicking his heels. "I see that you have already been introduced to everyone. I hope you had a good night's sleep," and walked over to them to greet them. Let's eat breakfast!"
With Salme and Elisa on either side of him, Stan said grace and everyone tucked in.
"There are a lot of people who want to meet you," said Stan, "which will occupy the better part of this morning, I suspect, though Władysław my eldest son is away until the weekend."
He looked at Silvia. "The Engströms' have extended an invitation to you to stay at their house, and if you are agreed, you'll move in with them tomorrow afternoon after you've settled down."
Silvia beamed and some of the others chuckled.
The remainder of the day was spent looking around Kadesh-Naphtali and meeting all the other colonists by visiting their homes one by one. Silvia was nervous meeting Misha and Sonja and was not quite as uninhibited as she had been in the car as Björn's women carefully, though discretely, studied this new potential sister-wife. It was hard tearing Silvia away from them to visit the Nilssons, but she was eventually persuaded to join the rest of us.
It took a mere three days for the Engströms and Silvia to be sure that they were for one another and that this was in the Lord's will. Björn was transformed. We watched with delight to see not only the new-found love leaven his own soul but also the way the relationship he had with Misha and Sonja deepen.
"Björn seems to be even kinder than he already is," Sonja had remarked with surprise to me.
I chuckled, for I knew what was happening. "That's what happens when you live polygamy in the Spirit, dear," I said to her. "The husband suddenly becomes a catalyst for more love in the whole family."
For Sonja this was, of course, all new. She was Björn's second wife and had never experienced another wife coming into the family as Misha had done. Like almost all sister-wives in her position, she at first felt a little apprehensive, for now she was no longer "new" to Björn.
"I feel a bit like the pig-in-the-middle," she said with a hint of worry in her voice. "Was it like this for you, Hélène?"
I smiled as I relived the time when Andreea came into the Stan's family straight after me.
"Yes, I know what you feel," I replied, "though I wouldn't describe it as feeling like a pig-in-the-middle. I prefer to think of it as being the creme between the two halves of the creme cookie."
Sonja looked at me blankly.
"Well," I continued, "you don't become a 'complete' plural wife until someone has come after you, though I guess that might seem a bit tough on whoever becomes Stan's last wife."
Sonja smiled nervously, half understanding only, and I began to wonder if I had chosen an appropriate analogy.
"You don't discover who you really are in a polygamous relationship until another wife comes in after you because you don't really have to give of yourself until that happens. Up until then, you feel like the spoilt one being let into someone else's marriage. But once someone new comes in, then you start seeing clearly just what the sacrifices of plural marriage are."
This would be harder to explain than I had thought.
"So why do you describe yourself as creme filling when another wife comes into the marriage?" asked Sonja, still not too clear.
Misha entered the room and listened with interest.
"I guess that's quite simple, really," I said, "because you don't become a whole and free person and wife until you have made the ultimate sacrifice in polygamy by making way for a new sister-wife. That experience makes you struggle inside and, if you overcome, mature. You become a complete woman and even more attractive to your husband."
"Oh?" asked Sonja incredulously, wondering how she might please Björn even more.
"Before another wife comes into the family, you're like the spoilt brat in some ways. It's unavoidable. It's like that when you get a new child too. And because you're new, you tend to get extra-special treatment. Not consciously, mind you - I'm not saying that Stan has favourites - it's just something that is natural to a growing family. But once someone else comes in, you're no longer the "new" one and it forces you to grow up."
"That sounds a bit scary," said Sonja as her forehead wrinkled up.
Misha butted in. "Oh, now, I understand perfectly what Hélène means," she said. "The only scary thing is that the relationship changes and you wonder what's going to happen - whether your husband will love you as much. You can't stop the change - it's just an inevitable consequence."
It was good hearing Misha confirm my own experience.
"The girl becomes more of a woman," she continued, "but no less attractive. I noticed that after you came into our family, Sonja, that Björn began to appreciate me in a new way. He didn't say much, but I knew instinctively that his love for me grew. It's hard to describe, really. All I can say is that it's wonderful."
I thought on what Misha said.
"It's like the princess grows up to be a queen," I said, trying to flesh out what Misha was saying. "When a new wife comes into the family, you suddenly have the responsibility not only of another wife but a less mature and experienced one. It awakens a motherly instinct in you - the desire to care, lead and guide her until she has come to where you are."
"But how did that feel for you when Andreea was much older than you?" asked Sonja.
"Age didn't seem to make much difference," I replied. "True, Andreea was more mature in a lot of things than I was, especially spiritually, but she was still vunerable and needed a lot of love and care as a new wife. That gave me the opportunity to serve her in a way I could never have served my other sister-wives. And I know she was grateful. She felt like all new wives feel in the beginning - a little guilty for being an 'intruder' into the family and 'spoiling' the routine. As maturer sister-wives, we have a tremendous opportunity and responsibility to give, serve and love uinconditionally, to make the new wife feel welcome and accepted. Stan really appreciated every act of kindness I showed Andreea and told me so often. And as a result his love for me grew and I felt even more special inside. But if I had been hostile or neutral to Andreea I am sure it would have actually caused our relationship to go down hill."
Sonja looked pensively into my eyes.
"This is the biggest test for you, Sonja," I told her, "even bigger in many ways than the struggle you went through accepting polygamy in the first place. Now others are involved who can so easily be hurt if you are insensitive or allow carnal feelings like jealosy to influence you. This will probably be the greatest test of your character and your relationship with Christ, and you'll discover just how much love and grace there really is in your heart."
Misha nodded in agreement and began sharing things the two had never discussed before.
"When you first came, Sonja darling," she said, "I had to wrestle all over again. Of course, I know it's tougher, in a way, for first wives because there's no-one else to support you. But your coming into the family made me face my sin-nature in a way that I had never been forced to before. One by one I had to take the spirit of jealosy, resentment, and pride to the foot of the cross and quietly let Christ put them to death."
Sonja blushed but Misha took her hand and smiled to assure her.
"If I hadn't had Christ, I don't know what I would have done," she confessed with head slightly bowed. "But I'm grateful it happened, and I'm grateful you married Björn, because it forced me to remove the last obstacles that were getting in the way between me and the Lord. That fight made me a whole woman. Being challenged to love you as a sister-wife opened up the way for me to love Björn even more and to love the Lord even more. It was this spiritual path the Lord wanted me to go down. He wanted me to see the real me. And you see the 'real you' best of all when a new wife comes into the family because there is nowhere to hide unless you run from the marriage altogether. It made me grow up against my will, but I am so happy that it happened when and how it did."
Tears began to well in her eyes and Sonja's jaw dropped as the two looked closely into one another's eyes. It was one of those magical moments that you never want to miss and which you never forget. Misha spoke right from the heart and in such a way that Sonja knew that she wasn't making it up. The two were hugging each other tightly and expressing appreciation for one another. Silvia would be to Sonja what Sonja had been to Misha. Once you've got over the "next wife" mountain, the ones that come afterwards become easier and easier until you almost don't notice it any more.
Hanna had been a bit special because of her peculiar problems but it had been twice as easy as when Andreea had joined us. Now that Elisa and Salme were here, and I was watching the third and fourth wives after me, it all seemed so natural. It was, It admit, easier having an older woman like Elisa than one younger than me like Salme, though logically it should have been the other way round. Perhaps Salme, like Hanna, reminded me of what it was like to be very young and of the special vigour that comes with a younger woman, a vigour that motherhood had begun to slightly take away from me. In a way, it was like wanting your honeymoon all over again, a thoroughly silly wish since it could never happen again, at least not the way it had been. I noticed a tiny twinge of resentment as I imagined Salme on her honeymoon, wishing I could be there, but quickly corrected myself as I came to my senses. You can't stop yourself from growing up. What would be the point in going back? You would lose everything that you had gained in your maturity. It is the law of life to grow and mature, and the wise woman accepts that without a quibble. What you lose in youth you gain in maturity, and there's just no way you can have the best of both worlds. The Lord has ordained that we mature and put aside childish garments2, and if you try to go against that, you go against both the Lord and common sense. No, I was wife number #7 and that is what I will always be, and there will be more after me. I am what I am and I am where I am. I have learned to be happy with that since it is the Lord's will.
I left the Engströms' feeling I had achieved something useful. Misha and Sonja embraced Silvia into their family joyfully and she became dedicated to Björn after only a week had passed. Both she and Hilda would return home to Tartu and move back permanently to Sweden the following spring. When the Lord acts, He acts quickly, sometimes taking your breath away. By April our colony would increase by four, to the praises of Yahweh.
1 Corinthians 13:11
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