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    FAQ 63

    Why Do Antipolygamists
    Have Sex on the Brain?

    Q. Why is it that whenever you discuss the subject of Christian polygyny that antipolygamists nearly always start by bringing up sex and accusing us of being perverts? Why can't they see the spiritual side of our lifestyles? Why do they always have sex on their brains??

    There are probably several reasons for this very common reaction. Firstly, for them marriage (even monogamous) is the licence to have sex. When you think about it, isn't that the primary reason that most modern Christians/Messianics get married? And this is, I suggest, why all kinds of marriage are actually out of balance, even amongst Christians/Messianics, because the forces that bring men and women together are primarily chemical rather than spiritual.

    But biblical marriage isn't supposed to start with the chemical or hormonal side at all. It was for this reason that full marriage was always preceded by betrothal anciently so that the parties would understand that the root of marriage is spiritual. Betrothal anciently (and increasingly amongst Christian/Messianic patriarchs) was a marriage covenant without sexual contact. The parties were legally married for life even without having 'sealed' their covenant by intercourse. If either party had a relationship with someone else during betrothal, it counted as adultery and was punishable by death.

    Betrothal does not exist in the churches (assemblies) which has substituted it for non-binding 'engagement'. Anyone can break off an engagement. Betrothal was given by Yahweh to teach us that the foundation of marriage is non-physical. Eve was given to Adam primarily for companionship and to be a helpmeet in his Kingdom task of looking after the Garden which Yahweh had given him to be his stewardship. Similarly, when Yahweh gives a Christian/Messianic man a wife, it is for companionship and assistance in his Christian/Messianic ministry. THEN and only then is a woman given for sex and the bringing forth of children.

    When some monogamy-onlyers react with references to sex it is usually proof that the foundation of their marriage - or belief about marriage - is sexual. It is a testimony of just how carnal modern man is - even Christians/Messianics - who have been strongly influenced by the neo-pagan culture around them.

    That is not, to be sure, the only explanation of such a reaction. I think many sincere people really do believe that polygamy is just a whore house. They have this mental image, fed and sustained by the media (and particularly by the feministic media) that the only kind of man who would enter this lifestyle must be a sexual pervert. And it is utterly false. Nothing could be further from the truth. The principle attracting feature for both men and women is not more (for the men) or less (for the women) sex but DEEPER COMMUNION WITH ELOHIM (GOD).

    This your average monogamy-onlyer cannot comprehend, especially if his philosophy of marriage is rooted in sex. He does not, for the most part, understand that marriage wasn't just created by Yahweh for the propagation of the species and to have fun in bed. He does not understand that there is a deep spiritual mystery in marriage which the apostle Paul started to articulate but which he stopped short on, perhaps restrained by the Holy Spirit from saying too much publically about something so sacred:

      "'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the Church (Messianic Community)" (Ephesians 5:30-32, NKJV).

    Marriage exists on the spiritual level "to make known the mystery of the Gospel" (Ephesians 6:19) and that eternal relationship we shall enjoy with Christ as His allegorical Bride. It is quite surprising, actually, how vague the thoughts of most Christians/Messianics are of heaven, and this because they are neglecting the great key, which is marriage. For within its boundaries - and particularly in polygamy - a drama is being enacted which is a direct window into the purpose of everything. Here, within the boundaries of polygamous family life, we see a reflection of the final goal - union with Christ. Christian/Messianic polygamy provides a unique opportunity for those who are truly committed 100% to Christ to live out the process that leads to the final heavenly rapture by channelling its disciples down a very, very strait and narrow way (Matthew 7:13-14). And because the path is so exacting, and because the gate into the heavenlies is only visible to those who are completely dedicated to Christ, few there be who find it (v.14).

    I know that a lot of polygamists get very frustrated because antipolygamists not only can't but won't see what our principle motivation for living this lifestyle is. They immediately equate us with Mormon polygamy which is founded on an entirely different basis, namely, a future life in the heavens populating worlds with millions of spirit children.

    Christian/Messianic polygamy exists principally to fulfil the higher mandate of multiplying LOVE in the universe. Yahweh has chosen this as the model upon which the whole creation has been founded - the model that describes His relationship to those of His children who have have matured in their salvation. If the marriage principle - and especially the polygamous marriage principle - had been so unimportant, he wouldn't have framed a mental image for us of His Son being the Bridegroom of a polygamous church (community) consisting of millions. He would have chosen some other illustration. But He didn't. Instead, He starts the creation with an earthly monogamous marriage (Adam and Eve) and ends it with a heavenly polygamous one (Christ and the Redeemed Church/Messianic Community). And since the relationship between Christ and the Church (Messianic Community) is an allegorical non-sexual one, we are being shown that the underlying impetus behind marriage is spiritual and not sexual. Therefore that which eternally binds is Christ in the husband and Christ in the wife/wives. In addition, it is Christ in the wives which binds them together too, mystically binding them into a single 'entity', the Church (Messianic Community).

    The reflexive reaction on the part of antipolygamists which immediately aligns their thoughts with sex (which in any marriage only occupies the tiniest fraction of our daily time anyway) is mute testimony of the depths of carnality into which men have fallen. Instead of having their eyes focussed up in the heavenlies by asking about the sacred reasons we live this lifestyle, their heads are immediately peering between their (and others') legs, parading their rear ends and showing the world the seat of their consciousness. (See The Short Fuse of the Monogamaniacs).

    If Christian/Messianic polygamy has a resounding message to such people it is surely this: lift your eyes upwards and try to understand the universe in terms of the spiritual instead of the carnal. Holy Echad Polygamists our whole marriage lifestyle on the model of the allegorical marriage between Christ and His polygamous Church (Messianic Community) - and until antipolygamists and others make an effort to try and understand this driving power in our lives, they are going to continually misunderstand and misrepresent us.

    Author: SBSK

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    First created on 13 August 2001
    Updated on 14 May 2016

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