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    FAQ 14

    How Do I Become
    a Polygamist Man?

    Q. I am interest in becoming a polygamist. What should I do?

  • First of all, make sure you know your Bible doctrine and be absolutely sure that the Bible vindiciates the practice of polygamy in both the Old and the New Testaments.

  • Secondly, make sure that it is Yahweh's will for your life and not your own personal desires. Examine your motives extremely carefully. Make sure you are willing to take a 'no' from Yahweh as much as a 'yes' before you start asking Him.

  • Thirdly, if you are already married, make sure that your wife is sure of the Bible doctrine and also comes to a testimony that it is right for her. If you don't, you stand a good chance of losing her, and if you have children, you stand a good chance of losing them too. Remember your responsibility to your wife and children. If you are not married, make it absolutely clear to your prospective wife that you intend to become a polygamist, that you will not enter monogamy-only vows, and obtain her agreement before you are married to be prepared to enter into the principle as and when Yahweh provides for a second wife.

  • Fourthly, make sure you are (a) trusting Christ with your whole soul to supply your every need; and (b) obeying all the commandments (Torah) to the best of your ability.

  • Fifthly, make sure you can afford it. Polygamy is expensive. If you can get out of debt, do so as quickly as possible. Debt later on can destroy a large family.

  • Sixthly, consider the effects of living this principle on your friends, employer, church/assembly membership, the law, and the possibility of a very negative response from all of these. The chances are you will be persecuted for living this principle. If you are not willing to be riddiculed, lose your friends and family (parents and other relatives), be sacked from your job, be taken to court, be put into prison, have your health broken and possibly lose your children, forget it. This alone will determine whether you are 100% in Christ or not, and trusting Him to provide.

  • Seventhly, when you do make the step of taking a second wife, make sure that you have your first wife's genuine consent. Under no circumstances pressurise her since she too will have to make great sacrifices. Though from the point-of-view of the Old Covenant Law (Torah) you don't need her consent, the New Covenant Torah of Christ places higher demands on you, and only a very foolish and unloving man would override her feelings.

  • Eighthly, if you have entered monogamy-only covenants with your first wife, you cannot break them unless the terms are changed by mutual agreement without any kind of pressure placed on her by you - if you unilaterally break them, a terrible judgment will befall you, for Yahweh hates covenant-breakers.

  • Ninethly, if you have children already, talk to them about it too. The chances are they will be against it if they have never seen polygamy in action. You will have to be very sensitive and tactful.

  • Tenthly, make sure you can find some sort of fellowship with other Christian/Messianic polygamists. Without it, life will become very lonely. This may require your relocating near others of like belief, which will mean changing home and job. If you are already in some sort of Christian/Messianic ministry with a traditional church/assembly, you will lose it and likely be excommunicated.

  • Eleventhly, you're going to have to work hard at your marriage for the rest of your life. If you have two wives, you'll require twice as much energy and attention than you had or gave as a monogamist. You should therefore also consider if you are up to living the principle health-wise.

    There is much more that could be said. A polygamist is walking in the footsteps of father Abraham and all the polygamists since. If you are in a country that tolerates or permits polygamy, not all the above will apply. Polygamy in Christ will demand the very best of you. It will require constant vigilence because you will be fighting against the law of spiritual entropy -- of fallen human nature in both yourself and your wives. If you're a lukewarm husband, polygamy definitely isn't for you. If you're interested in it out of idle curiosity, forget it. If you're interested in it for more sex, forget it. If you're not a genuine man of Yahweh and not a dedicated family man, don't even think about it. If you're interested because of the thrill of something 'revolutionary' or 'different', forget it, because it will crush you in the end. Polygamy is only for 100% Christians/Messianics who love hard work and strive for purity and perfection in their lives.

  • Finally, twelfthly, polygamy isn't for everybody in this dispensation, but only for a few. Therefore you must know whether you are in Yahweh's will or not. I would also recommend that you do not try it alone but try to find a Christian/Messianic polygamous community with some experience behind them. It's only in the last 25-30 years that this principle has been restored to the Body of Christ (Messianic Community) after 1,400 years of persecution and extinction. Some groups are more experienced than others and all have a slightly different slant on the lifestyle. There are Christian polygamists who have Calvinistic, Pentecostal, Baptist and other views that colour their particular form of polygamy. We here at this ministry are New Covenant Echad polygamists and are a little different from the others. If you are a Moslem or a Mormon then you must go to those religious communities for advice for we operate on different premises. Try to meet as many polygamists as time and other resources allow. There are many polygamous groups on the internet whom you can chat with whose links you will find on the main index page.

    One final thing - if you have been divorced then any previous wives have the right to return to you if they reform. You cannot deny them. If you do, then you are breaking the patriarchal law and Yahweh will not sustain your new marriages. That can be a great burden for polygamists who may have had unhappy previous marriages. But it is Yahweh's law, and in Yahweh's grace all things are possible. Society's definitions of divorce don't apply. You and your wives must always be ready to receive them home, no matter what their past record.

    I hope this serves as a helpful introduction.

    Author: SBSK

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    Updated on 13 April 2016

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