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Honoring Dishonorable Parents
Posted by Avah on December 28, 2008 at 1:39am
in Messianic Israelite Families
Honor their position, even when you cannot honor their behavior.
Acts 23:1-5 Paul looked straight at the Sanhedrin and said, "My brothers, I have, fulfilled my duty to God in all good conscience to this day." At this the high priest Ananias ordered those standing near Paul to strike him on his mouth. Dishonorable behavior by authority.
Then Paul said to him, "God will strike you, you whitewashed wall! You sit there to judge me according to the law, yet you yourself violate the law by commanding that I be struck." Those who were standing near Paul said, "You dare to insult God's high priest." Paul replied, "Brothers, I did not realize that he was the high priest; for it is written: 'Do not speak evil about the ruler of your people.' Honoring the ruler's position, even when the ruler's behavior is dishonorable .
Paul was asking forgiveness for speaking harshly to the ruler, but was not repenting over the truth of what he said, just for the way he said it to his ruler. We don't get into trouble by judging that wrongful behavior is wrong. We get into trouble by dishonoring: judging, condemning, looking down on someone for doing wrong.
To Honor Parents, Treat Them Like Adults, Not Like Children.
( The only exception would be when one is senile or has Alzheimer's.)
To disrespect parents, would be to treat them like children, as if:
-they cannot think, so you have to think for them...
-they have no sense, so you have to choose for them...
-they can't handle responsibility, so you have to carry all their
burdens...
-they can't talk about what is real, so you protect them
by hedging, you don't hold them accountable.
The truth is:
-they are responsible for what they think and for any thoughts
they hold onto or let go of....
-they are responsible for their own choices...
-they are responsible for what they do with their burden...
-they are responsible for their talk or lack of talk, for their
denial/deception/blame/martydom, or temper...
-they are adults, and you are not responsible for picking up after them.
To love my Mother or Dad is to treat them like I want to be treated. I am an adult, and I really don't want people to tie themselves in emotional knots so as to enable me not to face the pain of change, to take all the consequences of my own problems. I want those I love to share my burdens, not carry them all for me. I do not want to be spoiled, and I won't do that to my parents if I choose to honor them.
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Reply by Avah on December 28, 2008 at 1:42am
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This page was created on 5 May 2010
Updated on 5 May 2010
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